But when they use Malay language, suddenly I don’t get a thing :|

Will be back to write review from this post i’ve red before. Suddenly something popped out of my head. Just…. gonna give it a shot on my wp blog—soon enough.

I’m not that type yang suka pamer2: selfie, barang2, anak, suami, terbang kemana, libur kemana, makan apa. Enggak. Insya Allah enggak =))


Good Vibes HERE

Yep :)
Good saying, but that doesn’t mean we have to stop trying to live kaffah. Doesn’t mean we should abandon one easy rule as a muslimah: wearing hijab. Don’t act liberally, when we read syahadah, that means we are ready to follow every order from God.

For simple I’ll just say this: be good, be better, be the best. Focus on your self-actualizing, and stop judging other people’s flaw.

Hi wafaa What i am going to ask may seem offensive so feel free not to answer if you don't want to So from an atheist's point of view what do you feel about marriages and do feel that virginity has nothing to do with religion or is it nothing more than this middle eastern amendment


Hi, thank you for spelling my name correctly. Your question is a very good one and not offensive at all. I enjoy answering ones likes these.

1) The concept of female virginity and marriage go hand in hand, not only in regards to Islam but to how the concept of these two things developed historically. 

We now have documentary evidence of the pre Judeo-Christian times in Sumer, Babylon, Anatolia, Cyprus and Canaan (all in present day Middle Eastern countries) that the concept of marriage was well and common in those times. Despite this however, it was a common practice for married and single women to live as priestesses in a temple and follow the customs of the Sexual Goddess. They were sexually free and could marry at any time and still continue to visit the temples an serve in the, and even for that time they were considered to be good wives. Sex was viewed as a sacred act where men would come in to the temple and take men as lovers form their community (Stone 154). 

This sharply changed with the coming of the Hebrews and their enforcement of sexual ‘morality’. They began propagating anti sexual attitudes in their communities and shunning these temple women. The reason for this anti sexual stance was hardly religious or moral, it was purely political. To ensure inheritance, property and business rights were reserved to one man, they needed to be sure of who the father was. This could not be done if the women was sexually liberated and engaged in sex in these temples. When women in these temples had children, the children inherited the names, titles and property of their mothers and not the fathers, keeping the power in the matrilineal line of descent. 

The Hebrews wanted governmental control, to do this they needed more access to land, which could only be ensured by destroying this ancient matrilineal system.

2) This is may seem like a lot of tedious history but it is necessary to understand the history of marriage and sex in this region to know why it is like that now. The concept of placing pressure on the virginity of young girls in the Middle East is based purely on the patriarchal religion of Islam. Islam is what influenced today’s cultural norms and mores.

Virginity is the basis of family honor, and men will do anything to preserve it for the woman, whether she wants it or not. Female virginity (male virginity being much less of an issue) is a component of a family’s honor only so much as it reflects the family’s ability to control or protect “their” females from outside forces (non-familial males).  

3) Marriage as described by the Abrahamic religions and particularly Islam is nothing more than a means to own a woman. That may have changed now in more developed countries, particularly in the West where marriage is  financially and socially more simpler to do. I personally however put no value in it, a person should be able to remain just as faithful to their partner with or without signing a piece of paper. 

4) Virginity is a social construct meant to simplify and reinforce the slut-shaming of women in our patriarchal society. It means absolutely nothing to me and I see it as only a disgusting label created by men to keep women down and too embarrassed to admit that they love and enjoy sex. It especially bothers me when I see young women my age using this term.

5) Virginity has everything to do with Islam if you are a women. Everything centers arounds a Muslimah’s virginity. Why does she wear the veil? To protect her ‘chastity’ by drawing away attention from her body which is a ‘fitnah’ or ‘social chaos’.

A women’s body causes ‘social chaos’ that is why she must cover and protect it, to save her ‘virginity’ for her one true owner, her husband. If a female is thought to be having an inappropriate relationship with a male (even if she was raped) it reflects negatively on her as an individual and the males in her family for being unable/unwilling to protect or control her. Protection and controlling being almost indistinguishable. For women to enjoy sexual intercourse is for them to be cast into the category of being ‘loose’. The Qur’an states that a bride has to be a virgin, and according to tradition a woman found on her wedding night to have been “touched” brings shame to her family.


(When God Was a Woman: The Landmark Exploration of the Ancient Worship of the Great Goddess and the Eventual Suppression of Women’s Rites by Merlin Stone)

Hope this wasn’t too long for you.


Subhaanallah =)

— ~Andre Maurois  (via deservingporcupine)

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